Sunday, March 27, 2011

Occupation: Housewife

I've been totally soaking in role as housewife the past four days while I am in-between jobs. I've SO loved having the days off, but I can't imagine doing nothing for longer than about 4-5 days. (I'm definitely NOT knocking on stay-at-home MOMS, just stay-at-home WIVES. I don't have kids so I only had to look after myself!) Since I did have several days, I figured I might as well take some time to relax and pamper myself. I went and got my hair done, I spent time looking at paint samples for my guest bedroom, hung out at home while we had our bathrooms tiled (Yay!), but by the far the most excitement happened during a trip to get a pedicure on Thursday.

So, I decided to get a pedicure in the middle of the day on Thursday. I also happened to run into what I'm quite sure could easily be the cast of the The Real Housewives of Frisco. When I first walked in, I was totally blinded. Not by beauty, not by sunlight, not by nail polish fumes, but by the high quantity of bedazzled designer track suits. My ensemble - skinny jeans, a top from Target and black sandals - did not fit in. Em-bar-ass-ing.

After I made my way to the spa pedicure chair, they asked if I'd like a beverage. Why, yes. Thank you. I'll have a Dr Pepper. (Holler!) After my eyes adjusted, I looked around and realized that I made my first mistake. I suddenly looked around at all my highly tanned, track suit-sporting housewife pals (I use the term "pal" very loosely) and realized Chardonnay is the drink of choice. Woops.

So I sat quietly and watched as women made light conversation to one-up each other. I heard several women urging their manicurists to move a little faster as they have to be in line to pick up their children "BY 2:45!!!" Whoa, lady. Why are you sippin' wine and getting a mani/pedi at 2:20, then? Another fun fact: apparently, "Words With Friends" has just hit the 'burbs because I heard two ladies excitedly exchanging user names.

So, here's the main difference between me and all of them (besides the obvious lack of bejeweled track suit), this isn't a weekly trip for me and while they all dropped $65 for "the works", I brought in my $5 off coupon for a simple "Classic pedicure." (Such a faux pas, I'm surrrrrre, as one housewife's judging eyes told me.)

So, shockingly enough, I don't fit in with that crowd. (This is nothing new, though. Bottom of the food chain, you know.)Lucky for me, I'll be starting me new job tomorrow. It's much like a first day of school. But instead of my Mom, I have my husband reassuring me, "Of COURSE your new co-workers will love you. How COULDN'T they? You'll do great!" [[Thumbs up!]]

No comments:

Post a Comment