The Bensons v. Plano PD

You can file this story away in the "That Bi*ch is Pissed" folder.

OK, it's not as bad as it sounds. Really! But here's the lowdown. In mid-December, I received a letter in the mail stating that I owed $100 for running a red light. Boo.

So I looked for the when and where.

April 2011. No, that's not a typo. The City of Plano was sending me a notification for a red light ticket from more than 2.5 years ago. This was the first we were hearing of it. There was no picture included to prove I did it and no intersection - nothing - just a letter saying you need to pay this or we're putting a registration hold so you can't renew your vehicle registration. Bitches.

So over Christmas break, I had the hubby call. They essentially said that they sent the ticket and a follow-up to us (turns out it was our old address that we hadn't lived at for over 9 months!) He explained this and the lady was basically like, that's too bad, you can't argue it because it was from too long ago so you owe the $75 and a $25 late fee. After a little bit of smooth-talking that my hubby is so good at, she said she'd follow up with someone and call us back and then hung up on him. (No, she never called back.)

Cue me:

I'm talking snap-your-fingers-in-a-Z-formation mad.

As Greg puts it, "Oh, they messed with the wrong lady. Plus, you're a stay at home mom so you have all the time in the world to fight this."

My response:

Mmmm, not quite. (He was kidding.)

But over the past week, I've dealt with this during morning nap time. Connor's, not mine, unfortunately. Mostly because I get so fired up... and I just can't have sweet Connor around his crazy Momma when I'm dealing with things that really fire me up.

So my latest convo with Red Light Camera Phone Operator #3 was like this:

Me: But I never received the ticket to begin with. You've sent no proof via a photo and, um, this was nearly 3 years ago.

Lady: You're not the first person to have this situation. It doesn't matter if you knew about it or not, you still have to pay it.

Me: Our address had been updated with all state agencies and mail was forwarding, so it's not our fault that you were working off a database that wasn't updated. Can I at least have the late fee removed since this is the first I'm hearing of it?

Lady: No.

Me: Can I have a court date so I can present my case and argue it? (Can't you just see me entering the courtroom with Connor on my hip?! They clearly don't know they are messing with a former high school Mock Trial Lawyer. And I have the golden gavel to prove it.)
Lady: No, too much time has passed.

I got pretty mad, so I honestly don't remember all the details - I may or may not have threatened to call the local news station's consumer action line because "I think the public would be interested to know how the local government is trying to screw taxpayers and collect on something that allegedly happened almost 3 years ago. I say 'allegedly' because you show no proof!" Dramatic much? 

But eventually, I was able to talk to someone in the Plano PD and explain the situation. He was really super-nice and reminded me of a Grandpa. He got the late fee removed and even said something to the effect of "Shame on the State of Texas for not having their information updated." Yeah, take that, Texas!

So, long story short long: We got the late fee removed and we'll be paying our ticket.

Turns out I guess I ran the red light.

Woops.

You've Been OutMom'd

The Scene: It was the day before 4th of July. That would be July 3rd. I read in Connor's school's newsletter that parents were encouraged to dress their children in red, white and blue to celebrate, so of course, I picked out a red, white and blue outfit. Nothing fancy - to be honest, I generally put him in "play clothes" to go to daycare most days (onesie and cotton pants) because I want him to be comfy.

So, I walked into the school with Connor, but when I entered the Infant Room, all the teachers were crowded around a rocking chair taking photos. Everyone was absolutely dying over this little girl, Harper. Freakin' Harper. So when the crowd parted, I saw a little 9 month old girl dressed in a head-to-toe red, white and blue lace romper. And to top it off, she had the most ginormous "flapper style" headband I've ever seen on a tiny body. It was some Toddlers and Tiaras-type shiz.

 

Pretty sure I was all like:

 

(Note: I'm not knocking putting a little girl in lace. Heck, if I have a daughter, you can bet your bidness she'll be wearing bows and ruffles. But for daycare?)

And how am I supposed to compete with that? Poor little Connor was like chop liver in his Target onesie and pants. I was surprised they didn't just throw him in his crib so they could finish the photo sesh with Harper. I mean, the only way I could even compare to this spectacle is if I dressed Connor in an Uncle Sam costume - complete with a red, white and blue suit, a top hat and full beard. Actually... <<scribbles down note for next year...>>

A few hours later, I'm wrapping things up at work and I see the weekly newsletter from Connor's school come across my inbox, so I open it up and (throw some salt in the wound) who do I see in the newsletter? Effing Harper. Really it was just an adorbs picture of her, but as my eyes glazed over, pretty sure this is really what I saw...

I think I've just been outmom'd.

Harper's Mommy: 1

Connor's Mommy: 0

And for the record, this is Connor on July 4 (his "real" 4th of July outfit)   ;-)

"Mom Brain"

Everyone tells you about it - pregnancy brain. In fact, apparently, it's a real thing. I used the excuse during pregnancy, but I'll tell you right now, I did not really lose my brain until I had Connor.

We'll call this "Mom Brain." Imagine me very annoyingly saying in a fake cheery voice, "Mom Brain!" In fact, lots of mommies have mentioned this "mom brain" phenomenon to me and they all say the same thing about it, "You never get it back!" (Your brain that is...) I find it super-annoying, but sadly, true.

I've been having trouble remembering things - like, one morning I got all packed up and got Connor to his school only to forget his bottles. Yeah, he probably needs those. The next day it was my laptop bag. The next day it was my cell phone. Lucky for me, I've never forgot the baby!

And then one day at work, I was looking all around my desk for that bag of Cheez-Its I'd been noshing on. Where the eff did they go? It took me about 5 minutes to realize that the bag was in the trash can because I'd already ate them all, like 30 minutes before.

And that look the random guy at the office gave me the other day was likely NOT because I was proudly rocking my pre-pregnancy pencil skirt. Pretty sure it was because I forgot to snap my nursing bra back after leaving the pumping room at work.

Hey, crazy. Pull it together.

But he's totally worth the loss of my mind, don't you think?

Straight up Strollin'

Tummy Time

That face.... melt my heart.

3 Months Old